I’ve been hesitant to share a lot about how I have been feeling since the big move, because it hasn’t been all butterflies. I knew it wasn’t going to be all candy canes and milkshakes, but it’s been a lot harder than I anticipated.
I’m learning quite a bit about myself and about Jon and about how we work as a couple. I’m learning what it’s like to constantly worry about money, a state of mind that is completely new for me. I’m learning how to swallow the lump in throat every time I think about Tex and how I left him. And I’m learning how to bundle up for what I consider freezing, and locals consider nothing. (If one more person tells me, “Oh this is nothing, just wait until winter!” I may break down.)
With all change, even good change, there is a period of adjustment. There are high highs, and low lows, and what seems like very few plateaus in between. But slowly, I’m starting to truly settle in to this new chapter. Yesterday, as I stomped through leaves to my car after work, I looked around and felt really comfortable. Then I thought, “I’m in Wisconsin, I’m living in Wisconsin; I never even dreamed of visiting Wisconsin and somehow here I am and here I’ve been, for a month and half.” It is beyond bizarre.
At the beginning of the week, I went food shopping. I love the grocery store, but the traffic pattern to get there from my residence is quite ridiculous. But I drove to there without a thought, completely immersed in my new routine of getting groceries. And it’s moments like that where this feels normal and I’m mostly content.
I’m still having those other moments, where I’ve been home alone for a few hours while Jon is teaching his class, and all the blogs have been read, and the shows have been watched, and I’m still waiting for him to get home, and I do wonder what I was thinking. But when he gets home, and we commiserate about how cold it is while he makes himself dinner, I think to myself, “this feels right.”
(Now if only I could get everyone I love to move here, get a job that I love and that pays well, and change the location of Wisconsin to that of Florida, this would feel perfect.) Have a great weekend friends!
I know that time will get you that well-paying job that you love, at least. I love the top and bottom photos–brilliant. This post reminded me of the year I moved from balmy British Columbia to frigid Ontario. It was about this exact weekend of October when I went to stay a weekend in “cottage country” north of Toronto with my new friends and thought I was about as cold as I had ever been in my life! In retrospect, the ACTUAL temp. was not very cold at all, but I think it was the drastic change and I will never forget shivering non-stop for 2 days and feeling like I would never, ever get warm again. Thankfully, all things pass, and LOOK!–I am still here!
When I’m freezing, I’ll remember that all things pass. I hope in time I’ll find a job that pays the bills and that I enjoy. It’s not something everyone finds, especially in such a challenging economy. But I’ll try to be patient.
When I first entered the workforce in Vancouver Island (very long ago) unemployment was in the 18-22% range out there, interest rates were about the same and the economy was in the throes of an awful recession. People with integrity and intelligence like yours, who take the steps they need to take are the ones that do get the jobs, and will eventually succeed, so don’t even worry for a minute. Just do the things you need to and everything will fall into place in time.
I still have both of those moments after a year and a half of living away from my home. I’m lucky in that I love the city, but being away from loved ones takes its toll every day. And then there are those moments where I feel so at ease and like I’m flourishing and it’s euphoric. I’m excited for you as you continue down this path. It will be interesting and fun and challenging – and worth it
Thanks Kacy! I’m glad that you could relate. And I feel better knowing to expect the sad moments to continue for a while. I was beginning to feel like I should be adjusted already.
These are the times and moments you will always remember, my friend. It is the period in which you took a chance on many things. And I am certain you will never regret that, no matter the outcome. (You always have me if you need someone to chat with… just drop me a line!)
Thanks Rose! I appreciate your always available ear!
Oh how I feel for you. We have moved many times, not nearly as far as you have, but I know about that adjustment. I am right now trying to help my youngest through a rough patch again. High school can be a tough phase. I wish a good job for you and sorry for asking, but did I miss something, was Tex a friend or a pet you left behind? It sure makes it harder when you are missing someone.
Yes! Tex is my dog, and I had to leave him with parents because the house we’re in does not allow pets. If we end up staying for longer than a year, we’ve agreed to move so that Tex can come live with us. High school is definitely a rough time; your youngest is lucky to have a loving mom to help them through it.